RANDOM

hello homeland.
im back from Beijing but i wished i could stay there longer.
again, those sucky feelings came back and i just dont know how to make it go away.
i thought everything could change and start a fresh new beginning. but hell no. i just couldnt. yarhh. everyone could give advices easily but no one will understand whatever that ive gone through. friends and family took everything easily. when i kept by myself, not feeding myself, they would think im dieting. hey hell no, im just to weak to feed myself when every single day those emotions took over me. and i just cant feel my ownself. i wished i could be like u, go fer a break up.. forget about things so easily.. move on.. and start liking someone else. its just so difficult for me to forget u cause u meant so much to me. i tried hating you but it all doesnt work. the more i tried to hate u, the more i would love u. and everytime i want to move on, it feels like im stabbing and faking myself. everything around me reminds me of u. friends kept asking me why the break up. what am i supposed to say? n cuzzins would ask me 'where's ure boyfriend' and saying im dieting to take care of my figure. how more sucky could it be. and every single night before i could go to sleep, my mind is restless. i just couldnt have some peace in my mind. i would ask myself what really went wrong and why this thing's happening. and i just hope i will never wake up the next day. cause i know it will be another heart pain. those moments that we've gone through, i wish it would come back. i still remember the moment where u came running to my void deck to check things out when u thought i cheated ure feelings. ouh boy, how i miss ure jealousy, n how i miss ure anger. day by day that love grew stronger. i thought u would stay strong with all those promises u made. i trusted u with all my heart but i get nothing back in return. u thought only u could get jealous, ever u thought about me' i showed you a bit of jealousy and u went pissed off like the world has gone to an end. and i made loads of sacrifices. ive given u so much. ever did u appreciate that? ever realise how sucky it could be when u need that someone but he/she turn u down and put u away. ever been through being totally ignored' ever gone through someone you treasured most dumping u like a rubbish into the bin' i hope i could move on. but i just couldnt. and im dissappointed cause i thought u would understand me when u know uve once gone through all this. huhs. but instead u put me away. hurrr. u just put me away.. i would want to talk to someone but no one's gonna be the same as you. people, stop giving me advices. the more u give, the more it hurt my feelings. thats it.
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*fuck you for making me like this.
*fuck you brother for shouting at my mom.
*n fuck to all the people who make my mom feel hurt.
*fuck you!*
*i hate posting this but i just couldnt stand no more*
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takecare earthlots.

BAD-KITTY

yeah, i miss you, love..

your promises.. *sigh*

AEM at RP poly..

well, i miss that guy(name is there) on the paper. written by- a friend..

i had always wish you were right there beside me..

hellohello! =)

earthlots, today was pretty gerek! haha. I went out with my lovely+a little childish NCC mates(since exexbf couldnt make it) to watch movie; MADagascar at causeway. uhhuh! So, we met up at around one p.m. hmmph. MUS was very late. BUT, understoodable cause only he went fer friday prayers. LOL! okayy, so there were seven of us, me, ais, wahyu, habsah, faiz, syahmi n mus. We booked tickets and waited fer a few minutes before the movie starts. upon waiting, we went playing at timezone. haha. it was really fun in there, with friends all around. =)

ouhkayy. now lets talk about the movie. it was AWESOME! haha. Andand, it was fullhouse luhh sey! the starting was so cute. as madagascar was funny, there's always laughters here and there. But there was this one part, when Alex(the lion) and his friends were about to fly the plane, a boy from behind, at the theatre, stood up and said "bubbye! bye!" in a cute way. haha. macam paham sia!!! but cute. hee. hmm. from the movie, the same old lady, who called the damn big lion, 'badkitty' was like out of her mind sia. but that was what that makes the whole movie more funny.

hmmm. well, its best if u watch the movie ureself. MUST watch! =) after the end of movie, we took a few pictures; in habsah camera, and i went to buy some more things fer my trip to beijing. a few nore hours to go! weeee!  butbut, im feeling sad. he's not gonna be around.. hmmph..

well, that's it fer now..

takecare!

*haiz, i miss us being together..*

hellohello!

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today, as per usual, had AEM again, and yeahh, im always late. =) late by one hour. heehee. Thank god, today was the last day fer AEM. Throughout the whole course, i didnt contribute any idea or helping hand at all. huhs. Im freaking got no interest in it. haha. and sorry fizah, fer not helping u. So, instead of cracking my head out doing the proposal together with fizah, I spent the day commputer-ing. huhs. n of course, its a total bore.

During lunch time, I ate Nasi Ayam Penyet with mummy. hehe. Got free food again. (that's why i like to follow parents more than eating lunch with friends. =P) mummy's great. i love you so much mum. okayy. after the whole of the course ended, bro, meera n me went to cuzzin's house in between semb and yishun, which is a terrace to have a swim there. --rather than wasting money in public. haha. it was total fun and yeah, i didnt forget my swimming skills after so long not swimming. LOL! =) the yakuzi and the hot pool was damn gerek! haha. i was a little scared at ferst. cause bro n meera wanted to push me inside. n i was like screaming "hoiii!! jangan! jangan!" ..haha. idiotic people. =P

hurr. i think im getting so fat alrd. the whole day i kept eating. aunty bought nasi lemak and uncle bought rojak mama. im fat luhhhhh! irritating fats. haha.

hmm. after we're done at cuzzie's house, we walked back home. it was brother's decision. stoopiid him. haha. but the route wasnt really far. soo, okay luhh.

hmm. i guess, there's no more to talk about. so, toodles! =)

i'm going beijing soon!!! singapore airline, im cuming!!

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takecare people!

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*psst, ive moved on. =)*