the thought of you gives me hell.

hello again !

ouh well, this week was pretty HORRIBLE. and here starts it all.
on monday, i met nabil to tutor him on maths. it was so-called our first meet up and DUH, my first time teaching him. we spent time in yishun library for he requested that area. and so, i had no choice but to force my legs there. don't u know that i've been kept terribly busy this whole week' and sugar nuggets, it will continue till i end my Olvls. helling freak. and yarh, nabil had to leave early due to curfew, i think. haha. however, i stayed alone to complete those few pieces of hmwk i had brought along. sungguh the happily, i went home smiling like one crazy fellow. why' b'cause i so-called coincidentally met one of my darl-ex. and due to that, after the super long one year of lost contact, we finally text each other. bluerghh. my freaking close OBS partner. and im missing OBS. freak !!
ok next. tuesday till friday, i'm kept busy with after school programme. however, i managed to spend a little time with dearest mum on thursday. ouh freak, it hurts my vision and deep in, my heart. stupidity !! and that explains why i was freaking behaving like 'that' this morning. the late-coming, the no-mood, the silence, and the dieting. but fuhh, lucky darl-ex text to keep me occupied. thanks to freak-asses. and another thingy that keeps me wondering like one freak. supernum camp clashes with my fnn camp. how more freaky could that be' and due to that, i really have to fast forward my task, and finish my decision and time planning before the others does. freaking troublesome okayy'

and im so not gonna post about that too personal thingy. let it just stay as a draft. sigh''

and for you, that silent cry.
that's fer now.

TC earthlots.

and so why, why all this feelings'
sometimes, not knowing is way much better.
and no, no one knows how bad it feels.
it really is, that bad.
when someone just dont seem to care.
for the fact that they promised.

no, i tried to move on.
and be strong.
yet, once in a while, its you.
you came across my mind.
and i know you know.
but you just dont care.

and still, it hurts.
for you could move on and forget about me.
that so fast.
and you called it true love.
you took only a few steps, a few days.
just so few and u've found someone new.
and i was there, to talk to you.
but still you just dont care.

and yes, in that, ive tried my best.
but still i failed.
failed and failed, forever failed.
though i kept my words.
i kept my promises.
but you' what had you done'
not even a promise u kept.
and ouh. only one thing.
to break that heart.
great. how nice.
so, that's ure present for me'
after everything that i put into'
and now ure running away'
that so easy'
what do you think i am then'
huh' no, i aint gonna let you go that easily.
im just waiting for the right time.
and hey, wait for me okay'

..

ouh. those thoughts.

tell me why, youre so hard to forget.

don't remind me, i'm not over it
tell me why, i cant seem to face the truth
im just a little too not over you

aren't memories supposed to fade
what's wrong with my heart
shake it off, let it go
didn't think it'll be this hard

should be strong, moving on but i see you
sometimes i try to hide what i feel inside
...

a little too not over you- david archuleta

..
and yeah. its still there. right down there. is it true' yupp. it is. and who' its just you. but i know, i gotta be strong and move on. i cant let it ruin my life. no, not right now. and memories, i'll endure till it fade. and let bygones be bygones. and that phrase of lyrics, everything is true. and yes, please, im begging, dun remind me. it hurts. deeply, and i swear, it really do.

and crap, this week, a little too tiring. as promised, after school programme has started. from tuesday to friday. ma fan !! especially when there's ncc. its a little too rush. those uniform. and that day, squeezed in sir's car to SSTC. boys and the only girl at the back seat. how cool' and woa, part a's, those sec ones, too cute and toooooo noisy. but hey, they're total fun and madness. ouh. let me be proud of my cutest cadet. he's named, faqih. simply the shortest and the cutest. does those named faqih meant to be short'' oops ! blurt it out. so sorry.

and ytd, total defence day, carried out emergency drills. ouh. friday the 13th. the switch in my class went crazy'' all those smoke and sparks. and i was right infront. and the two guys told mr wee. instruction was to get out of class. *yess, hist lesson missed. but only fer a while. urgghh.

ouh. last but not least, happy valentine's everyone. dearest friends, ncc mates; ais, mus, melvin, sk, syahmi, habsah, akmal, wahyu & faiz , izza & nabil, and everyone else. have a blessed and never ending fun and laughter with all your relationships. =)
and to izza, leen wont be like that slut. mark my words.


and for now, i shall end this post.
take care dear earth. =)

*u just don't get it do you' i miss ure voice.